NRIs dos and donts

Recent months, there is a significant jump in number of accidents/violent incidents/crimes committed against/by NRIs in North America.

 

I don't have to enumerate them as they are all over the web and newspapers in India.

 

What's going on..

 

As with any systemic issue, it is very tough to pinpoint the tipping point for a trend like this. There could be several reasons behind spike in these incidents. The question to ask is why now.

 

I came to this country in 1991 to pursue MS. I personally think NRI landscape starting changing between 1998-2003 when H1 quota / offshore work got substantially increased providing increased opportunities in IT.

 

In the process, we didn't have sufficient time to take new comers thru' the vetting process with American etiquette and culture. For us, who came on F1 visa in early 90s, we had a different orientation and introduction to American culture. We got crammed into student dorms where in seniors / friends constantly coached on do's and dont's of this Great Nation. Since we were under severe financial stress to pay college tuition and loans, affording cars in first 2 years was a distant dream.

 

In the process, we had time to learn how strict US laws are, not to chat on line with any strangers, not to drink and drive, etc.

 

I am thinking there are large numbers again entering US on F1 and there are few seniors to coach new students as most of them have come thru' H1 visa in the past decade.

 

Added to this, we specially NRIs are adventurous, have inner competitive spirit to settle down faster, acquire new luxuries like car, condos before our first cousins.

 

In the process we cut corners in not spending required time to understand all US laws, driving skills, ..

 

I sincerely think that everyone of us specially new F1/L1/H1 visa holders should take a moment and look at followin dos and donts

1. Importance of planning a road trip is not assimilated among Indian students. In India, asking directions, following safety rules like seat belts, sleeping before long drives are either frowned upon or made fun of. After securing visa, suddenly young desi students lives are getting transformed from BTech to MS within weeks, and they still think it is OK to voilate safety rules. More information on planning for long drives is at http://www.independenttraveler.com/resources/article.cfm?AID=34&category=2
2. Plan ahead if you are driving by taking sufficient rest/sleep. This I think is the biggest cause of accidents for Desis. We suddenly plan to meet someone in other city during the weekend and all roommates jump in last minute. After reaching, we will have fun ..bdays, movies, drinks, night long cards, partying..we never get sufficient sleep for the long drive next day. If everyone needs to be at school or work we start like 3:00am the night before for 90 mph drive increasing vulnerability for accidents.
3. Make sure everyone wears seatbelts and always signup for sufficient driving lessons even if your roommate makes fun of you..it is dangerous to drive on freeways without proper skills
4. Make it a rule not take any cell phone calls while driving or any other form of distraction like food, music, navigation maps,

Other Safety issues for Desis

1. Get to know about American laws. One example is that everyone should know that there are always cops online as "disguised teens" responding to your chat requests.. definitely it is not worth it to chat on line. ..it is a trap ..if you are bored go to a Desi movie or Telugu Assn function, Temple or visit a Friend or subscribe to MAA TV or watch Brahmanandam comedy clips..lot of fun-filled activities to kill boredom
2. Laws here are very strict. Even pushing someone in anger results in a "aggravated assault" felony charge. Property damage, slips on walkways / driveways can result in law suits. That's why Americans are extra cautious about law and very rarely indulge in risky behaviors like arguments in public, road rages, domestic voilence, etc.. They know one can spend years in jail if the other party chooses to press charges.
3. Get to know American culture. There are stark differences between our cultures. Americans are good in planning ..recently I was in a salon, someone was calling a stylist for an appointment. She gave 2 appointments 3 months apart. I curiously asked her why the 2nd appointment. She said he wanted to book next appointment also.. he knows when he will be ready for next haircut..how many of us do this kind of planning. Dress code is another big thing in this country. Benjamin Franklin in 19th century itself coached young entrepeneurs how to dress and communicate to be successful in life. We fail to recognize that dress code/maintaining eye contact during conversations/firm shake hands are something that are engrained in this society for centuries ..
4. Make every attempt to make new friends and try to be a good listener.
5. Never aspire for all the things in this world overnight just because you have a monthly paycheck..sometimes even if you can afford to spend, you might be buying new risks ..like stocks, houses, condos, cars. It's OK to drive around old Chevy Your parents understand you better in an old Chevy ..be yourself and take time to relay your successes backhome> most importantly enjoy your life, celebrate your friendships, get involved in the community..signup for local Telugu Assn, Local Temple membership, volunteer in charity organizations like SpreadIndia, Asha for Education
6. Always be connected to our Motherland whether it is visits, calls, reading, movies etc..

 

 

Regards,
Venkat Aekka
vaekka@yahoo.com
http://vaekka.blogspot.com/